Has breaking up with your boyfriend or girlfriend made you feel unhappy?
“I can’t believe we have finished, i never expected it and now i feel upset all the time”
When someone finishes with us, it can feel devastating. We may find that we feel sad most of the time, our sleep may be affected and also our appetite and we may feel like crying. You may experience feelings of anger and jealousy which aren’t very nice but are normal when splitting up with someone we care about.
It may be very difficult to think about anything else and you may find you are becoming obsessed. This may be made harder if you see the person most days at college or near to where you live or you know that they have started to go out with someone else.
It doesn’t help if people around you are saying that ”you’ll be ok” , “there’s plenty more fish in the sea” or saying “you was too young anyway”. Splitting up with somebody, no matter what age you are, can be very painful and feel like you are grieving.
If this break up is making you feel extremely sad, make sure you talk to friends and family. This will really help and you may find they have been through what you are feeling and can give you advice. If you want to chat online with someone about anything that’s worrying you click here to use the Childline chat that works like MSN messenger. This is for young people up to and including 19 years old.
Other things that can help are keeping active or keeping
busy. Keeping busy can really help with unhelpful thinking as it will distract you.
Avoid taking substances, misusing drugs or drinking alcohol excessively. You may think these things will help how you are feeling right now but they will make you feel worse in the long run and won’t help you think clearly.
Make sure you eat properly and don’t leave huge gaps in between eating or begin to binge eat. It is common when we feel upset to not feel hungry but eating small amounts will make us feel physically better and we think well, when we eat regularly. The section Eat Well can give you tips on the importance of diet on our mental health.
If you have tried to all these things and you don’t feel any better feel you must speak to your GP, he will be able to talk to you about any treatments that could help.
If you are having suicidal thoughts you must speak to someone immediately. If you are thinking of ending your life you must:
- Contact your GP immediately, if the GP surgery is closed there will be a telephone message or your call will be diverted to the GP out of hours service.
- Attend your local Accident and Emergency department
- Phone the Samaritans on 08457 90 90 90
- If you have already created a ‘keep safe plan’ please refer to this plan of who you feel is best to contact.